A Camel, A Needle, And A Literalist

(This post may contain all kinds of blasphemy, but it's not intended. I'm just having random thoughts. I'm not even sure I can tie it all together. Perhaps I need a med increase? Heh)

A camel, a needle and a literalist walk into a bar...

Okay. So I don't really have a witty follow up. I'm not even sure why I'm thinking of this, as I've had no biblical discussions lately, and am not prone to discussing my own spiritual views usually.

I just wanted to reference the idea it is more difficult for a rich man to get into the kingdom of heaven, than it is for a camel to go through an eye of a needle. I mean, c'mon. That doesn't even make sense. I've searched high and low, and I've yet to meet a camel that can fit its humps through the eye of a needle. (Just the implication it is even remotely possible forces me to keep looking.)

I tend to think Jesus is probably a lot darker than many want to believe. And in my head, His voice sounds suspiciously like Barry White.

I should probably admire King David for his pure heart, or Jonathan for his loyalty in friendship, or Abraham for his willingness to sacrifice, or Ruth and Naomi for the demonstration of committed family... but do you know whom I most admire in the Bible? Well, I'll tell you. The hookers. Think about it... no one thought they were worthy of spit if they'd been on fire, but that didn't stop them from wanting to touch the hem of a Savior. Talk about nerve! And faith! And... hope! That's just crazy. Jesus liked hookers too. And that's why I like Jesus.

I've said before and I'll say it again, I think God would have been a republican, but Jesus would have been a democrat. And you know what else? I bet they'd have still gotten along just fine.

God is a riot! I don't think there is a funnier being than God. I mean, He made a donkey talk- how is that not hysterical. I bet He was rolling around on the floors of Heaven when that little incident took place. And the humor wasn't lost on Jesus either. His was kind of sarcastic humor though. The whole, "Who are you?"... "Who do you say I am?" Oh man, funny stuff.

Whew!